Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
Measuring your booze intake in glasses is like measuring Rosie O'Donnell's weight in ounces.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
I can't wait to get home and brush the fuck outta my teeth.
Literally.
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
Randomize
