you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
Randomize
