Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
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