omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
Randomize