I'm lost and stupid without you.
so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
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What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
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