It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
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It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
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