Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
I stole all of the toasting champagne and did an interpretive dance to "wind beneath my wings". I am literally everything you're not supposed to do at weddings.
But your showmanship is impeccable.
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
My liver appreciates your vow of avoiding matrimony
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
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