i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
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