you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
Randomize
