i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that?
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
No one would take shots with Caroline so she asked the bartender for like 20 jagerbombs and then shouted "JAGERBOMBS FOR HOMELESS ANIMALS BENEFIT" and everyone started doing them with her
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
Oh honey. I will not JUST be drunk. I will be spring break drunk. Spectacularly hammered. It will be glorious for all watching and embarrassing for anyone that has to drag me to bed.
I was sitting down, taking a piss with a boner, her cat walked into the bathroom and walked up to my legs, I sneezed and pissed all over her cat through between the toilet seat and bowl, it ran off screeching. She thought I peed on her cat on purpose. Kicked me out
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