You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
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searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
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If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.