Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
Randomize