im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
Why is there a business card for people who need bail bonds in my wallet...
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
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