you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
I heard you threw up in your lap?
I heard that too.
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
And the next thing I knew I was blowing this random hot italian bartender with an uncircumcised penis in his work closet
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