i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
I spent three hours in the ER last night to figure out that my friend just had to take a shit
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
Randomize
