At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
The guy in the room next to me just offered to hide the next dose of morphine he will get for his broken leg under his tongue and then swap it with me in exchange for a roll of the good toilet paper my parent brought for me last they visited. The psych ward is a lot more hardcore than I thought.
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
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