they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
Your topless pictures make me question reality
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
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