Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
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