Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
Well, I woke up with a text message from my cab driver that said "I hope you're alive," so that's a good indicator of how I was acting last night.
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
I couldnt sleep the entire night because her cats kept reaching under the door like they were trying to eat me for taking their place on her bed.
I always knew youd fuck a cat lady
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