Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
Randomize
