So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
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