I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
I am on my way right now and I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU EAT MY BURRITO YOU WILL NEVER SEE MY TITS AGAIN
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
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