My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
Crop dusting thru forever 21
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