There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
I told him I would only take his calls if he was dead, dying, capturing a midget, or buying me shots.
I stand by my new policy.
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
The things happening in my intestines right now should only ever happen at truck stops and frat houses.
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
Randomize
