That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
Randomize
