Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
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