yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
You know what, I don't care that I got too drunk and didn't make it into the boat party. If I had, I probably wouldn't have peed on you later while we soundly slept. I feel you need that in a best friendship.
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
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