I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
I was hidding Easter eggs in CHURCH this morning when one of the older men came up to me and said "I always knew you'd be a bunny just not the Easter kind" ... Our congregation obviously has high hopes for their pastor's daighter
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
Need help. Super baked. Stuck on couch. Dying of thirst. Bring paint thinner or something to pry me off. Only thumbs and neck work.
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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