He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
there's paper in my vomit.
I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
You pole danced in your parka.
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
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