No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
some girl just asked me how to spell unconscious. I really want to know what she was texting.
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
You take a step back sometimes and are like "when was the last time I was sober?" or "wow I need to stop putting everything in my vagina"
Is this an intervention?
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
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