Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
Randomize
