I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
I am on my way right now and I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU EAT MY BURRITO YOU WILL NEVER SEE MY TITS AGAIN
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
Randomize
