no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
yeah seriously, fuck school. I'm changing my master's thesis question from "what are the neuropsychological correlates of antisocial personality" to "will my cat drink this beer"
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
Randomize
