dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A 5 day bender that ended with refusing to pay my bar tab before I left the city. I offered to send them a selfie so they knew to never let me back in.
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
Just so you know, I choose to answer your bootytext tonight because it was the most creative.
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
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