I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
I went in to wake you up this morning and you had a condom draped across your throat like a necklace. There were no boys in the house last night, what were you doing?
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize