Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
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