I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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