Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
Holy shit, you lost your virginity on 11/11/11. Now every time someone fucks you, they can make a wish. Your vagina has officially been transformed into a wishing well.
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
I'm sharing a breakfast burrito w my uber driver
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
Randomize
