Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
When you called me you were telling a hobo that you couldn't spare ten bucks bc that was your beer money. All your words were slurred.
Fuck him.
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
This is the difference between me and him; he buys you flowers, I buy you a dildo
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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