and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
tonight lets celebrate not being married
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
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