my roommates friend slept in my bed when i was out of town..she ran out screaming cause she saw my VCR
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She texted me and said she was fingering herself. Don't respond to this because she's the perfect girl. I'd love to smell her cell phone after that.
I assume you meant to text someone else on your contact list instead of your own mother...
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
im about to go through the checkout with 3 flasks and a wedding card. let the judgement begin!
update: cashier guessed cash bar before i could say anything. completely bypassed "dry" and knew cash bar right away. i love this state.
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