I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
I will one day have loud vengeance sex as my revenge against you. Until then I'm just going to sit in the living room playing John Mayer while you're trying to do it.
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
Randomize