i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
apparently my drunken alterego is a lazyeyed bisexual.
So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
I couldnt sleep the entire night because her cats kept reaching under the door like they were trying to eat me for taking their place on her bed.
I always knew youd fuck a cat lady
Randomize
