Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
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