we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please come collect your inebriated significant other. He just sleep-farted and scared my cats. Please hurry.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
Randomize