I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
Now that I'm the boss, there's nobody to yell at me for smelling like a bar in the morning.
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
Randomize
