So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
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