But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish they made helmets for livers.
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
I'm experimenting with sincerity
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
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