I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
when are you leaving homes?
it's 7:51. why the fuck are you awake at 7:51
I had a sex dream about Oprah.
go back to sleep
dude. it was a sex dream. about. Oprah.
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
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