I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
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