Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
Is that strawberry winking at me??
Randomize
